The Fear Of Drama - One Reason Why Men Fear Commitment
The thing that used to worry me most about being in a relationship, was being "stuck" in a relationship that sucked. It worried me so much that (secretly) I had a phobia about commitment. I didn't want to commit myself to ANY-one knowing that drama was certain to find its way into my life. And, there were times when I had "old" drama to deal with, so I definitely didn't need any new drama piled on my plate.
But, as time flies, things change, people change, my perspective towards life changed, and I decided to look at the opportunities and the Unknown as a series of chances for new adventures. In other words, I decided to "go with the flow" and allow myself to be open to new friendships and new relationships. I was still a little hesitant because I didn't want to lose my freedom (like most men who fight the idea of being in a commitment or married), but I opened up, and I'm glad I did....
But, I'm still a little bit concerned about the "drama" yet to come.
Now, I'm not talking about getting into a kung-fu fight with the girl. And, I'm not talking about yelling and screaming and calling each other names. But, what do you do if the both of you start to lose interest or begin taking each other for granted?
Hell, being stuck in a boring relationship is almost as bad as being stuck in a toxic relationship.
I can't fake like I "like" someone when I don't.
Some people can fake and pretend that they care for a while, but eventually, their true feelings will come out. They'll begin neglecting the person. Or, they'll become verbally (and possibly physically) abusive. They might turn to cheating. Whatever. I don't want to live like that.
Overall, my relationship is sweet. I'm happy. I hope things could stay this way forever.
But, a couple of nights ago... I think I may have seen a turning point in my new relationship.
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But, as time flies, things change, people change, my perspective towards life changed, and I decided to look at the opportunities and the Unknown as a series of chances for new adventures. In other words, I decided to "go with the flow" and allow myself to be open to new friendships and new relationships. I was still a little hesitant because I didn't want to lose my freedom (like most men who fight the idea of being in a commitment or married), but I opened up, and I'm glad I did....
But, I'm still a little bit concerned about the "drama" yet to come.
Now, I'm not talking about getting into a kung-fu fight with the girl. And, I'm not talking about yelling and screaming and calling each other names. But, what do you do if the both of you start to lose interest or begin taking each other for granted?
Hell, being stuck in a boring relationship is almost as bad as being stuck in a toxic relationship.
I can't fake like I "like" someone when I don't.
Some people can fake and pretend that they care for a while, but eventually, their true feelings will come out. They'll begin neglecting the person. Or, they'll become verbally (and possibly physically) abusive. They might turn to cheating. Whatever. I don't want to live like that.
Overall, my relationship is sweet. I'm happy. I hope things could stay this way forever.
But, a couple of nights ago... I think I may have seen a turning point in my new relationship.
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I can some what agree with not wanting drama in your life or any one else life for that matter. However if you STILL had drama from the past, why even put yourself in a situation that will cause you to develop feelings for some one?
ReplyDeleteIt was good that you decided to open up and step out on faith. Here I go again with a question; WHY do (some) men look at a committed relationship as losing their freedom? Instead of gaining a loving, caring partnership/ relationship with someone? What is it that you would be losing by being committed?
A boring relationship is toxic because it cause a person to do all the things you named above. For sure that does damage to both who are involved, causing low self esteem, low self worth and value. It is never wise to be "FAKE" with anyone.
I'm excited to hear what happened a couple of nights ago.